Thursday, September 30, 2010

Ratchet


Mind spun, spinning like a ratchet, hatchet-running, funning around, inverted frown found
in mind now find hide away things to say that should be could be would be said
but so hard when that part your heart to mend to send for is half dead

Don’t worry the fury you shy away from, cry from shame in, will not hurt being burnt from out within
We’ll crank the winch, crush and clench and wrap-trap the sad-madness stagnant sitting pitting inside
And when making its way out, not a speck fleck left from under, rise high you will, ascend end eyes wide

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Sumov1

Forgive my pale paranoia
The old gears still grinding
Distrust, disgust, with uncertainty
Running amuck

No reason why
Just the past in mind
The trust well has
Almost run dry

Work it out in my head
Rip it out with bloody hands
Thought this thing was (thought this ghost was)
Beat bone dead

Hard to explain try
So hard to refrain I
Need to let go
Learning to let go, you’re helping me let go

And it takes someone
Someone like you
To make it clear, to show
There’s no question, no untrue
And it takes someone
Someone like you
To make sense of this fear
Burn it from (out) my mind, no red, influx blue

Patience with this now
(Patience) You will need
Hope it doesn’t (tear) wear too thin (quick)
With all my filth I plead

Hold tight now please don’t
Let it slip out of our
Sight we will see
When the cure kills my dark hour

Nothing grows that is
Not soiled once first
Dried out and then rained on
Only to satisfy our thirst

Our seed is buried far too
Deep, our roots deep they do lie
Trampled upon or stomped
Flower never wither, never it will die

And it takes someone
Someone like you
To shake this quake, insane
Reformed, rewired and renewed
And it takes someone
Someone like you
To kill this rotting state
Steady me, my lady, still may go askew

We are the sumov1
The sumov1 we shall always be
No matter what may come
The sumov1 makes us free

Friday, September 10, 2010

KMFDM - Trust

This song. rocks. my. ass.

Submit and reveal
What you hide and conceal
Open up and enable
Put your cards on the table

Conquer and define
Your life is on the line
Roll up and blackout
No time to hesitate and doubt

Take what you're being given
Make your stand
'Coz the life that you're living
May soon come to an end
Do what you can
What you want, what you must
Feel the hunger inside
Hold on to your trust

Confess and purge
Experience every urge
Approach and achieve
Strengthen your beliefs

Admit and defend
Your emotions 'coz they send
Out the message that it's you
And that's the only thing that's true

Do what you can
What you want, what you must
Feel the hunger inside
Hold on to your trust
Do what you can
What you want, what you must
Feel the hunger inside
Don’t lose your trust

Safe and secure
Never be too sure
Show and tell
Until you go to hell

Love and hate
You're destined by fate
Play and work
Enjoy your time on earth

Do what you can
What you want, what you must
Feel the hunger inside
Hold on to your trust
Only death is eternal
Make no mistake
What it all comes down to
Night shall overtake

Do what you can
What you want, what you must
Feel the hunger inside
Hold on to your trust
Do what you can
What you want, what you must
Feel the hunger inside
Don’t lose your trust

Do what you can
You’re a beautiful child
Do what you want
From a beautiful land
Do what you can
Lift the curse on me
Do what you want
Could you live without me?
Do what you can
Just one way
Do what you want
One last kiss
Do what you must
Gimme the bullet
Don’t lose your trust

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

I have so much to say but I think it's all going to fall on deaf ears. Ears made of stone. Ears that are connected to a brain already convinced of another outcome. It seems anything I do or say now will be full of rot and stench and poisonous, caustic sludge. I have so much to express. I hope when I get the chance it's not going to be too late. Conclusions already told. Mind already sold. I've been sleeping okay again, but I'm more exhausted than I've ever been. This is so hard. I just want to move forward and prove myself. I just want it to be over. I suppose in a way it already is.

My trust in this is keeping me going. My knowledge of our past in all of this. We have always prevailed as long as we've trusted in one another. And that's not going to change now. At least not for me. No way, no how.

I just want to hear her voice.
I just want to see a sign of hope.
I just want to feel some of this heaviness come off.
I just wish she wanted this too.
And I just hope she is alright.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

I want to send you a telegram. I want to tell you that I'm sorry... That sometimes I can't help it when I'm a slimy, slithering snake, covered in weirdo scales. I guess that's who I am... who I can be sometimes. Unpredictable. Unlikeable.

You can be the same way you know.
Keeps me on my toes.
I suppose.

Some ask why we go on. Some ask what this is... what we share. I used to be able to make attempts at ambiguous descriptions. These days the answers don't come. But... I still have a few that we will understand.

This is growth. This is advancement.
This is change. This is hope.
This is strength and this is fragility.
This is the reason to continue on with this chaotic journey. This is living lovely as sweet, vicious revenge in the eyes of our enemies. This is destruction and this is creation. This is harmony, cyclic and beautiful. This is beyond comprehension. This is timeless. Endless.