Tuesday, December 22, 2009

December Never the Same

Sometimes I wonder if you knew something I didn’t.

Something we didn’t.

Looking at pictures of you, I can almost see it in your eyes.

I wish I could talk to you.

I wish I could pry behind those eyes.

I wish I could ask you why.

As always, I have my opinions.

I have my suspicions.

None of my shit matters though

‘cause we may never know

and your physical being

and your reasons why

exist only in realms

of non-existence


I love you.

I hate what you’ve done.

But I can’t judge… for once in my life.

Living… really… is a choice.

As is dying.

I just hope for you

you’re better off dead

than you were alive.

Has the pain subsided?

I hope so.

I’ll always miss you.

Wish you could’ve just pulled through.

Fuck, Shannon.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Regarding Fall 2007

That autumn not much mattered.
There was an endless fountain
of booze
thanks to my roommate's twenty-something thousand dollar loan.
The only tests we had
were that of psychological and physical stamina.
Drinking was our study time and
our instructor:
the drink.
Deathly crystal clear
always the worst.
Glowing, smiling caramel
always the best.

I could never say, "No."

Most nights we'd have a blast
plastering our deepest
and drunkest
words and actions
onto the faces and minds
that happened to show up
and fall victim.
We owned that fuckin' place.

Some nights we relegated to the woods
the bright, crackling fire as our night light.
Strangers would appear
out of the darkness.
It was neutral there
and we hated it that way.
It opened too many doors
for idiot morons
coming in
ruining the vibe.
We didn't own that place.

Other nights

when it was quiet

we would talk philosophy
and suicide.

Friday, December 4, 2009

I am in love! -OR- Powdered/pilled alcohol, come to me baby

Despite what I've always thought of how traditional & conformist marital status was (is) like, it looks like I'll be getting hitched myself quite soon. Yes, I know I'm a hypocrite. I'm only human!!

A look at my new lovers -- yes that's plural -- here, here & here.

Also, this is pretty cool... and completely unrelated. A look at how far we've come in storage.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

This site is dope!

Check this out, then this out, then float around. I hope you have time. If you don't bookmark it!

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Her Words

her words
always makes me feel
a slight desolation
and despair
but I'm not sure

Maybe it's because
they're lost
amongst millions
out there
on sites
that nobody
but close friends
will ever read.
Maybe it's because
even though
they mean the world to me
in the 'grand scheme of things'
in that circumstance
we are all just like
those words
and thoughts
and feelings...

All alone.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

My 1st Pie

"...and then she screamed...

...onion, garlic, tomato!"

No, no, it was supposed to read,

...and then she screamed...

Original stencil designed for pillow/comforter set.
Contact me for details.

This winter will be chilly.
You know you want it.


Thursday, November 12, 2009

Sid came to town...

...so we gave him the light show of his fucking life!

And the aftermath?
Far too much to list.

Anticipation... fervent.

Intervals of madness interjected... probable.

End of the season reflection... a PROMISE!

Friday, October 23, 2009


Wandering through old memories this morning.
7:30am is too early to be awake not still
being awake.
The unconscious was a bit strange night of last.
Dreams less sweet, or so it is said.
Missing things I've never missed before.
Time is playing hopscotch with my memories.
My memories are playing Russian roulette with my emotions.
Friday came too fast again.
Saturday may prove worthy.
As for today, it's time to send that letter.

The one I was supposed to send last weekend.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Friday, October 16, 2009

Summer storms now distant : (

In honor of the forthcoming Winter,
here is a poem I thought was lost.
Written in the Winter of 1997.

Early morning arrivals
Halls blessed, emptiness
No people, no energy
Makeup applied, perfected
Cold clear frosted pane
Green grass the same
A helix of silence
An array of serenity
Thoughts of the present

I've taken a turn
No going back now
A devotional conquest
An advocate everlasting
Concluding my endeavor
My morning, like all:
This is solitude

Cleansed and soon erased
The fierce flames
The shocking memories
All found
Not forgotten

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Gentle Exploding Bloom

I never dance
for anyone
the way
I always dance
for you.
It's never perfect.
It's always sincere.
Like how
a morning glory
would look
if you witnessed its bloom
time-lapsed: disintegrating into particles
a cloudy blue-black puff
almost smoke-like
in its action.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Farewell, Little Italy

Leaving my summer headspace. This was the 2nd summer I've called this part of town home. Last summer it was just down the street where I put my head to rest. All things must come to an end, and all things inevitably change. What will the future hold? Hopefully more beautiful memories to cherish & display. Don't worry... I'm bringing all of you with me.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Anson Says...

"You know you're an alcoholic when: you drink beer in the shower! ever since you told me that I can't take a shower without one! in fact if i don't have a beer then I don't bother showering."

~excerpt from Anson's email to me~

On a similar note, I had to appear in court today for an open container violation, and, I gotta tell ya, what a fuckin' racket.
$100 for drinking a beer? What is wrong with this picture?

And lastly, HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY, MARISA!! I miss you!!

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Are you fucking kidding me? & Cool Links

Okay, I may know nothing about current fashion, or, moreover, what is considered fashion, but I DO KNOW that these are fucking ridiculous. Hey, Martin, no thanx-- I don't need a fucking windshield on my face! And you know, I REALLY wanted to spend that extra $570 I had on your FACESHIELD.

You know though, in comparison to the super-huge absurdity people are wearing and passing off as shades these days, these aren't that far off. Scarrrrrry! Sorry... not today. Not ever. I swear if people start wearing this shit I'm going to begin a genocidal massacre. Better yet, kill me! Please! ...or else I'm going up on an urban hilltop toting a semi-automatic rifle with a large scope, a lot of ammo and getting shit DONE. "DIE YOU MOTHERFUCKERS!
~bambambambambam~ DOWN WITH THE FACESHIELD!" ~bambambambambam~ "HA HA HA HA HA!"

*sighs* Okay, now that that's off my chest. Here is some dope video projection shit. (
Musion HD projector that uses 3D moving images.) Fuckin' AWESOME! Followed by some more dope video projection shit. Gotta love it.

oh, and if you liked Duck Hunt or Contra, you'll LOVE this.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Cool Designs

This guy rocks. I'm a fan of the red paint table, the 3 to 1 seats next to it, and the WTF lamp.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Quote of the day...

"we're young enough to basically have ethernet cords for veins."

- Kat David

I love you. You rock.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Velvet Acid Christ 'Slut' lyrics

This song is fucking awesome. Killer lyrics too. Off of the 'Fun With Knives' record. Lyrics courtesy of velvetacidchrist.com

Well it may sound absurd. I want to be a wreck for you.
Smash out my honor on your floor.
Fill up your bathtub with my moods.
Well it may sound a little frightening. I want to swallow all your skin.
Chew your soft tissue into ash.
Beat your ego black and blue.
I will be your doll. I will be your hole.
I will crush your bones.
I will abrade your soul.
I will be your toy.
I will be your thing.
I will tear you down with the twist I bring.
I will be your doll.
I will be your toll at the gates of hell.
That is what I’m for.
I will be your flesh.
I will be your end.
Then on to the next.
I will start again.
I will be your doll.
I will be your girl.
I will remove your heart.
I will burn your world.
I will be your object.
Tease and tear.
I will be your, “hell I don’t have anything to wear.”
I will be your slut.
I will be your bitch.
I will be your never ending, un-befriending, self expending, moral bending, thorn.

here's a fan video
. scroll down the page to view

Thursday, August 20, 2009

DV says...
"boss is out to lunch

I'm ready to bolt,
it's mad expensive to get here.

I aint workin for free
fuck this shit"

Best quote.


Thursday, July 30, 2009


So apparently I have a blogger acct. When the fuck did this happen? February 2008... apparently. Not a clue.

Hmm... this could get interesting.